You can't do this - but you must! /facepalm

[ladyunicornejg]

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ACTUAL site rules...

Please note that all new members do not have the private message (PM) feature activated. It is required that all new members are regular and active on the message board for at least four (4) weeks before this feature is granted, which is the same rule/principle for access to the closed/protected boards.

So yeah...that's bad IMO...even worse given the nature of the particular site.  But no...lets make it worse.  SAME site, SAME rules list...

We offer protection to each member. If having a problem with another member on the site or in private messages or emails please inform an Administrator for help by private message (PM) and the matter will be handled in a confidential matter, therefore we do not allow posting of such incidents should they occur.

Wait...what?

Any post that is derrogatory to <SITE> or another member will be deleted and the poster will be sent a written warning immediately upon removal of the post. We are open to any positive suggestions by PM to an admin.

PM away guys... if you have a problem or a suggestion, PM the admin.  If you're new, you can't PM.  I guess if you're new and have a problem -> SCREW YOU!

// This was an emotional support site.

// My response was *close tab*

VERY welcoming and supportive of them.  ABSOLUTELY the kind of site I'd want to join. /sarcasm

[Kai]

lol.....

I guess they have problems with people joining and then spamming via PM, or sending nasty messages, with no intention of being a part of the site.

I can understand their worry but they need to make it more accessible somehow without the need to limit newcomers so heavily.

On ExoChat we have a report button on all PMs so there is no need to be afraid of people using PM's because although we cant see whats being said, our members have the security of being able to report a PM and then we can see the original version of what was sent. If it is extremely abusive then we can act on that with our evidence.

As for spam PM's, well that may happen at any time, but I find that 2 or 3 fake member profiles (which arent used for posting) are usually enough to catch out any mass-spammers abusing the PM system, because they cant tell who is the administrator and who is a genuine member so are likely to PM the fake accounts too, and get caught.

I suppose they are so fearful of hurting peoples feelings by them receiving nasty texts or spam via PM they are not seeing how limiting it is for newcomers to get site support.

But there are always ways around the issue, if they wanted to solve them.

[ladyunicornejg]

Perhaps...the overall attitude of the rules there didn't impress me though.

As for the PM thing...yeah, there are ways around it.  For one thing, they're generally stored unencrypted in the database. :P  I have a plugin on my sites that will allow admins to view PMs (the version in the database, exactly as it was sent, unparsed) but isn't obtrusive or anything...you have to actually go to it specifically, and even then you only view ones you actually click on.  Then it also has settings on *which* admins can do this, so ultimately even if I get a lot of staff only the very TOP admins will be able to invade privacy this way anyway (and those already would be able to because, as I said, it's in the database).

But overall... lol